So first things first! Happy Belated Anniversary to Jay-Z and Beyoncé! Recently these two love birds celebrated 12 years of marriage!  As I kept seeing all of the anniversary shutouts via social media to Bey and Jay, it got me to thinking, What are some of the lessons that we’ve learned from Beyoncé and Jay-Z about marriage?

Lesson #1-Fight behind closed doors and even if it seeps out… keep it private until you both have had the necessary time to work through your feelings and come to a resolution. Don’t be afraid to go and see a therapist.

Lesson#2-Learn to walk in your truth-I think a lot of times people can have misconceptions about the dynamics of marriage because of point one that I made above, which was keeping it private. While I do believe that it’s important not to be out here in these streets sharing every intricate detail of your holy matrimony, sharing how the two of you worked through some very difficult times in your relationship can not only be therapeutic for the two of you, but for other couples as well who may be going through, or will eventually go through a similar situation such as yours. Walking in your truth also helps each partner take accountability for their behavior in the marriage. Marriage takes two people that are both willing to be honest when things are good and when things are bad.

Lesson#3-A lifelong partnership takes WORK!!! PERIODT POOCH! Compromise, Communication, and Ugly Cry’s are all a part of a successful relationship.

Lesson#4-Don’t be afraid to recommit!! We all saw that Jay-Z and Beyoncé had a little fallout in their marriage a few years back, and when they came back together they had a re-commitment ceremony. I think it’s important to never be afraid to recommit yourself to your relationship at any point that either partner feels that the trust has been broken. This does not specifically mean infidelity in the relationship. There are several infractions outside of infidelity that can result in loss of trust. As life changes it may be a good idea to revisit those vows and update them to fit you two where you are right now, as well as to remind each other of your original commitments to each other.

This same practice applies to our single friends as well. Don’t be afraid to write out your own vows to yourself. What things are you committed to not accepting in your next relationship? How do you vow to love yourself so that you’re open to giving love and be loved beyond your past various traumas, whether they be, childhood, sexual, a relationship that didn’t work out, or even self-inflicted trauma. Ewww that’s one we don’t like to talk about, self-inflicted trauma, but we’ll save that topic for another night.

So talk to me, what has being in a committed relationship taught you about yourself? And for those of you who are single, what has your singleness revealed to you? Leave your comments below!

Want to weigh in on the conversation about relationships? Join me on the COUCH! Every Friday at 9PM CST! We will be discussing relationships and all kinds of random, randomness! This is a time for you to kick back, relax, laugh, and connect with other people OUTSIDE of your four walls. The only rule to sitting on the couch is that you have an open mind. SEE YOU IN THE ZOOM ZOOM ROOM